i find it funny that i can sit here at your computer, in your house, alone, since you are at work, and still feel perfectly comfortable.

it's like i belong. and i like that.

it also scares me to death, because i know that soon you will be leaving. you will be leaving, and i am scared as all hell that i will lose this feeling. this happiness, this friendship...

i trust you with everything, and i dont know what it will be like when you move an hour and a half away.

not that i need you, not that i am dependent. its just nice to know that someone is there for you. be it 1 o'clock in the morning, or 1 in the afternoon, if i call i know you will answer.

college, just thinking about it scares me.

just thinking about you leaving scares me even more.

this has probably been one of the best years of my life, with much thanks due to you, and there are plenty of other friends that mean the world to me, and that made this year so wonderful... but no one came close to you. we just have something special... no matter how silly you are, most of the time we are just silly together.

we can spend days together, and talk about the same thing over and over and over and it never gets old. its only old when we stop talking about it. ;-)

i look around this little log cabin, and i see pictures of you and your family all around me. i love pictures. there is a picture of you and your sister sitting in front of me, and knowing that i will be missing seeing that smiling face everyday is just about killing me.

but that will not come until september 7th. that leaves a whole summer in front of us. and knowing us, it will be full of adventures.

i will miss you though, and the thought of you leaving scares me.

i love ya Ash, you really are the best best friend a girl, or anyone could ever ask for.