Sunday, October 26, 2003

today the air smelled of rain and fall, and the combination was intoxicating. i went for a drive in the rain when i was was supposed to be doing my homework, but overall i think that going for a drive was more productive than homework. driving in the rain is satisfying, and also sad at the same time. and as i drove in the rain, and listened to the laid back sound of john mayer, i thought of you, and how much i missed you.

i worry about you, i miss you, i love you....

i realized the other day how much i missed you, and its not just because you went away...

in fact i dont miss the person that went away at all, i never liked that person, but i miss the person that left home a long time ago, that left you a long time ago.

the person that i used to know. the person that i loved, the person that i shared so many dreams with. the person i shared my passions with. the person i spent everyday with 2 summers ago. the person that left at the beginning of this summer. the person that loved life, and everything about it.

you told me the other day you didnt care anymore, and hearing that made me want to cry. i knew for the longest time that you didnt care anymore, and i always wanted you to admit it, but now that you have, i would give anything in the world for you to take it back.

do you remember how much fun we used to have, do you remember how happy you were?

i do, i know you dont remember, because if you did, you wouldnt be where you are now.

come home, we all love you, come back to us... you will always have a place, our doors are always open. dont run to far... we love you.... and most of all, we miss you... i think you miss you too...

and i just want you to know, the person you were, i always wanted to be, and i still want to be. you inspired me. if that means anything anymore...

today, driving in the rain, i thought of you, and i missed you more than anything...

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