being away for a week can change a person a whole lot.

i am 17 years old, which seems alien to me. like 17 isnt an age i ever considered i could be. 16 that was big, big things happen at 16. 18 is big too, you are an adult. but 17, 17 was never an age i considered.

i dont feel that i am 17. i feel older, or younger, or actually, i feel that age doesnt matter.

age doesnt matter, it is maturity that is important. and that is how i handle and run my life.

and right now, i just want to be 7 again. 7 would be nice. people could tell me what to do, and i wouldnt question it, because i would be 7, and 7 is too young and innocent to know better. i could run to you when i got scared, and ask you for advice, and you could give me all the answers, because i want to know them, and right now they all seem much to important for me to figure out on my own, and i want your help.

unfortunately i am 17, and stuck. and everything that matters right now, and everything that is oh-so-important in my life at the moment i have to decide on.

and all of the cart-wheels and flips and turns in life are becoming much too dizzying for my stomach to handle.