there was an apple on the counter, the kind that sits there for a few days and looks soo good you just want to  eat it, but you think to yourself, let it sit, let it ripen one more day, just one more day.   an apple that i was looking forward too, ohh so much, the kind that is perfectly shaped, with just the right amount of shine.  perfect to eat.
 
and when i finally gave in and took a bite out of that apple it was the most bitter tasting thing i have ever eaten.  ever.
 
the bitter taste was left upon my lips for the past few weeks.  and after awhile the bitter taste and feeling has built, and left me feeling bitter and angry.
 
this situation, i have felt very bitter and angry about it for too long.  and i have complained and done nothing about it for too long.  i hate people that do that.  dont complain if you arent going to do anything about it.  complaining gets you no where.
 
so stop it katie, stop it damn it.
 
sometimes things are rough on both sides of the fence, and you have to take a good long hard look at the other side before you realize it. 
 
so i will humble myself, as i should have at the beginning, and i will reteach myself the art of compassion.  to be used, even when it is not deserved, in hopes that maybe, just maybe some will come back to me.
 
and i  know it wont be easy, so... help me, please.